FISH THIS FRIDAY, MAY 29, UNION TAVERN
Once again we are descending upon the placid village of Union. The schedule allows time to eat fish, throw darts, eat chips, throw down a few pints and other wise relive (or in Marvin's case, continue) our adolescence. Barring bad weather, there is no reason not to lower the hood and drive with all due haste for this fun monthly event.
WELCOME TO NEW OR RENEWED MEMBERS
Bryce and Jerry Weiberg, of Norfolk, (a father son team) Brian and Jane Goldsmith of Council Bluffs, and Keith and Jeanne Freeouf have all joined Flatwater this past month. Keith just bought a BGT from Brian.
Don't worry about Brian being out of cars. There is a 75 B, Old Blue and 2 or 3 other A's just awaiting restoration. The Weibergs own a nice B drop head. We know the car, it won the distance award at the last FWAHC show . Welcome all of you. We hope to see you at different events.
YOUR LBC AS A TIME MACHINE: THE LAKE TOUR.
The first touring event of the season is scheduled for Saturday, May 30, 1998 at 11:00 A.M. All roads driven on this event will be paved. We will meet at the State Farm Regional Office at 84th and "O" streets in Lincoln, and will then drive south and west to Denton, then north over hills and around curves to Pawnee Lake, and further north and west to Branched Oak Lake where we will take a drive around the lake to enjoy more curves and hills.
From there we will drive a short distance to the James Arthur Vineyard and Winery, where we must negotiate curves of a different sort. Saucy wenches, amusing fools, brave knights and lovely ladies await us at the renaissance faire which is being held at the winery on the 30th. There will be a wine tasting of some of the JAV award winning wines, and food will be catered by Billy's Restaurant from Lincoln. The cost is gasoline, necessary repairs, and about $12.00 if you choose to partake of food and wine. Otherwise there is no admission to the event. |
FOR THOSE CYBER-HEADS AMONG US:
Beware of the following new viruses:
- PAT BUCHANAN VIRUS:Your system works fine, but complains loudly about foreign software.
- COLIN POWELL VIRUS:Makes its presence known, but doesn't do anything.
- HILLARY CLINTON VIRUS:Files disappear, only to mysteriously reappear a year later in another directory.
- OJ SIMPSON VIRUS:You know it's guilty of trashing your system, but you just can't prove it.
- STEVE FORBES VIRUS:All files reported as the same size.
- PAUL REVERE VIRUS:This virus doesn't horse around. Warns you of impending attack: Once if by LAN, twice if by C.
- POLITICALLY CORRECT VIRUS: Doesn't identify itself as a "virus" -- instead, refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."
- ROSS PEROT VIRUS:Activates every component in your system just before the whole thing quits.
- DAN QUAYLE VIRUS:Thier is sumtheng rong with yure coputter, but yue cant fugyur outt watt!!
- GOVERNMENT ECONOMIST VIRUS:Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.
- TEXAS VIRUS:Makes sure it's bigger than any other file in your computer.
- ADAM AND EVE VIRUS:Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
- CONGRESSIONAL VIRUS:The computer locks up and the screen splits in half with the same message appearing on each side. The message says that the blame for the gridlock is caused by the other side.
- AMERICAN AIRLINES VIRUS: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
- FREUDIAN VIRUS: Your computer becomes obsessed with marrying its own motherboard.
- PBS VIRUS:(With apologies to Dr. Danielson). Your program stops running every few minutes to ask for money.
- ELVIS VIRUS:Your computer gets fat, slow, and lazy... then self-destructs, only to surface at shopping malls, coffee shops, and service stations across rural America.
- OLLIE NORTH VIRUS:Turns your printer into a shredder.
- SEARS AUTOMOTIVE VIRUS: Your data won't appear unless you buy new cables, battery and shocks.
- HEALTH CARE SYSTEM VIRUS: Tests your system for a day, finds nothing wrong, and sends you a bill for $4,500.
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JUST WHO ARE WE ANYWAY?
The following page is as complete a listing as we have of current Flatwater
Membership. (Editor's Note: Because we do not have permission to publish addresses
on the internet we are publishing only names in this cyber version of the newletter.)
Adickes, Ed
Anderson, Ben
Anderson, Edie
Economy and Performance
Bailey, Ted
Barnes, Dave
Brasch, John
Bredwell, Robert
Bronner, Steven
Buchholz, Terry
Chloupeck, Joe
Dabbs, Joe & Fran
Danielson, Jim
Davis, Terry & Kathleen
Dresser, James
Dunn, Lori
Evans, Bill
Fishbaugh
Fisher, Lynne
Fluehr III, Jay
Freeouf, Keith
Gebhart, Thomas
Gibney, Jim
Giger, Don
Goldsmith, Brian & Jane
Goldstrum, Mark
Grover, Frank
Henry, Chuck
Higgins, Gary & Karen
Holbert, Fred
Holthaus, Troy
Hutchens, Steve
Hutquist, Henry
Kahler, Scott
Kennedy, Kenneth
Koch, Cary
Koch, Randy
Manke, Craig
Marshall, Marvin
Maudlin, Kenny & Kayla
Meier, Fred
Melnick, Joe
Mitcheltree, Brian
Morgan, George
Needham, Jerry
Neemann, Glenn & Kathie
O'Brien, John
Olson, Jim
Orand, Jerry
Peterson, Ernie
Petrick, Donald & Carla
Richner, Jeffrey
Rixen, Glenn
Rockby, Bob
Rometo, Al
Savener, Nick
Shaw, Bob
Shaw, Richard & Sherri
Smith, Ken, Moss Motors
Stepanek, Gary,
Stork, Jim
Track Motors, Road and
Trainer, Jerry
Ulrich, John
Weiberg, Bryce & Jerry
Williams, Steve
Willis, Larry
Witt, Steve
Witwer, Winston
Wollen, Thomas
Weiberg, Bryce
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