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FWAHC Newsletter
January 2001
PAGE #4

When I returned home, and had the "first car" conversation with my dad, the answer was a forgone conclusion. I needed something "practical." The fact that my first car ended up being a 1959 Fiat 600 suicide door coupe doesn't seem very "practical," but "red" and "convertible" were the kiss of death for the Sprite. To further rub salt into my wound, my best friend talked his folks into a Bugeye, and one of my teachers showed up with a brand new MGB. Black with red leather! Then the guy that used to fix the Fiat (for free cause he felt sorry for me) bought an E-Type.

The damage was done and the seed sown. I subscribed to Road & Track, Sports Car Graphic, and met some guy in Lincoln named Bud Dunklau because something was always broken on my friend's Bugeye. The rest, as they say is history.

SIGNS FOUND IN KITCHENS

  1. Kitchen closedăthis chick has had it!
  2. Martha Stewart doesn't live here!!
  3. I'm creative; you can't expect me to be neat too!
  4. So this isn't Home Sweet Home... Adjust!
  5. Ring Bell for Maid Service...If no answer do it yourself!
  6. I clean house every other day.... Today is the other day!
  7. If you write in the dust, please don't date it!
  8. I would cook dinner but I can't find the can opener!
  9. My house was clean last week, too bad you missed it!
  10. A clean kitchen is the sign of a wasted life.
  11. COOK CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!
  12. I came, I saw, I decided to order take out.
  13. If you don't like my standards of cooking...lower your standards.
  14. You may touch the dust in this house...but please don't write in it!
  15. Apology...Although you'll find our house a mess, Come in, sit down, converse. It doesn't always look like this: Some days it's even worse.
  16. A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and this kitchen is delirious.
  17. If we are what we eat, then I'm easy, fast, and cheap.
  18. A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
  19. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
  20. Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.
  21. A clean house is a sign of a misspent life.
  22. Help keep the kitchen clean - eat out.
  23. Countless number of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead normal lives.
  24. My next house will have no kitchen - just vending machines.
  25. Gardening forever . . . Housework, never!
  26. Dull women have immaculate houses.

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